While his older sister was singing and dancing her way into a “High School Musical” frenzy at Drama Camp, Evan and I had some “mom-time,” which, as the mother of two, is rare in our home.

So, how did Evan choose to spend those many hours of complete, utter aloneness with me? I’ll give you one guess — it starts with S-K-A-T-E and ends with I-N-G. Yes, skateboarding.  Though, in my son’s persuasive way, he called them “Mom skate-dates.” Aww, he’s my adorable little manipulator.

Don’t get me wrong, I love to skate with my son. Of course, by skating with Evan I mean I have the honor of lugging all his gear, Gatorade, and my folding chair (with built-in cup-holder) all over the place to watch him. But, during these skate-dates I take on many roles as a SkateMom, starting with making sure all his physical needs are met:

1. Did he put on sunscreen (or “sunscream,” as Evan calls it)? — Check!
2. Is he staying hydrated? — Check!
3. Does he have a variety of nutritious snacks at his disposal? — Check!
4. Are there plenty of Band-Aids in the car? — Check!

After that, as chief of his “pit crew,” I make sure all of Evan’s mechanical needs are met:

1. Trucks tightened or loosened to his satisfaction? — Check!
2. Helmet, knee and elbow pads secure? — Check!
3. Fallen Footwear skate shoes tied in a double knot? — Check!

My final role, of course, is his number one fan. Since his dad was not with us skating, I can SO say that. To your skater, this is the most important role that you can take on with him or her.

Contrary to what your skater may tell you, they love having you there watching them — being their own personal cheering section, keeping the running tally on just how many “Pop-Shuvits” they did or just how high they aired out of the bowl. It’s imperative to support them in something they love doing, showing enthusiasm about it and spending that time with them. Even if you do nothing except give them a “high five” as they roll on by you, they notice.

I also think it is kind of neat to go to a few parks you haven’t been to before. Surprisingly, most towns do have them, and even the smallest of skate parks have something to offer because none are exactly the same. (This website has a great park locator on the main page - check it out!).

This week, we went to nine different skate parks. Yup, NINE! In sweltering, 98-degree sunshine, in two different states, uphill both ways. Now I know that may sound boring and exhausting to you (except for you crazy diehards—rock on!), but I have to encourage you all to try, even if it’s on a very occasional basis. You don’t have to go to as many as we did — one or two would be a great start! You will be surprise at just how much you (and your skater) enjoy it. Don’t forget the “suncream!”

“A skateboard?” I asked, somehow trying to figure out where in the world my young boy had even noticed the mere existence of skateboards. I knew they didn’t mention skateboards on any “Thomas the Train” episodes, so then I had the horrifying thought that maybe the parental controls on our TV had been switched off to allow channels like MTV. “Yikes,” I thought, “what else could he have seen?”

I had reservations – HUGE reservations – about giving in to my son’s request. What kind of a mother would I be if I let my innocent, unsuspecting little man skateboard? Bloody emergency room visions danced in my head as I kept my voice calm, explaining in my best 3-year-old vocabulary that he wasn’t quite big enough – yet – for a skateboard. Little did I know how much I would later regret using “yet” in that sentence.

Christmas came, and after hearing months and months of the same question – “Am I big enough yet?” – I eventually gave in. Luckily, I got an insanely good deal on a skateboard that was on clearance. And those who know me best know that the only thing that comes close to my love for my son (or lovely daughter) is my love for a great deal.

So there it was, all wrapped up on Christmas morning – a shiny new Spiderman skateboard. Yes, this was a memory to be enshrined in the Doherty Family Hall of Fame for me being the “Mother of the Year.”

The skateboard had only two rules. First, no leaving the basement. Second, Evan had to be bundled from head to toe with elbow pads, knee pads, wrist guards and, most importantly, a helmet. (My husband talked me down when I mentioned the possibility of using bubble wrap.)

The way I saw it, after a few days of the “padding up” ritual, the skateboard would be history. Not that I was trying to discourage skateboarding as a whole, but my husband and I had pictured Evan someday playing for the Boston Red Sox. In my ignorance, I never thought of skateboarding as a sport. In fact, I never really gave skateboarding a second thought before it became my son’s only thought. Boy, how my life and my opinion were about to radically change.

Lessons from the Skate Park

Watching Evan grow in skateboarding was like watching a butterfly come out of its cocoon. I know that sounds ridiculously cliché, but when I finally allowed my son to venture out to his first skate park, after months of rolling back and forth in the basement, I saw something miraculous and amazing in him. It was something I hope every parent who visits this Web site will get to experience with their child.

My son, that same little boy who used to give up or say he hated an activity when something frustrated him, had changed. I saw him fall and get up, trying again and again and again until, at last, he was successful.

Sometimes he would succeed that day, but other times it would be days or weeks later. I will never forget the look of pride, accomplishment and satisfaction on Evan’s face after his first ramp, his first quarter pipe, his first Ollie. Now 4 years old, he was not the same little boy in the park that he was everywhere else. Skateboarding transformed him. Of course, there was still frustration when something didn’t go right, but on that concrete I saw determination in my son for the first time.

“Even the big boys fall down, Mom,” he’d say, pointing to the other, much older, skaters at the park. “But then they get back up and try again.”

The lessons from the skate park taught Evan something that, as a mother, I had been trying to teach him all along. Although they may not dress or speak in a way that is “approved by society,” those skaters had become very important teachers. By their actions, they showed Evan it was OK to “fall down,” as long as you don’t stay down. Don’t give up. Keep trying. The skate park taught my son the power of persistence.

Anyone can sit at the bleachers at a skate park (if your city budgets for them) and appreciate skateboarding. It’s when the boarders open their mouths that it gets frightening, but not for the way you might think (depending on where you are, though, there is plenty of that as well).

Skateboarding comes with its own language. And, unlike Spanish or French, you can’t take a class on this language. This is one of the ways we hope this Web site helps. We hope to save you the embarrassment of the “blank stare” when you are trying to converse in skate speak. It also keeps adding new words on a daily basis – each time a new trick or new variation of an old trick is accomplished. One of our goals is to help you handle yourself in the skate park, skate shop, or skate competition like a pro (or at least like a parent of a pro). We want you to be the hippest, coolest parent at the skate park! (Do kids still use words like “hip” and “cool”?)

Don’t worry, we will be gentle. Just stay with us.